Theocrats Back Marshall, Ignore Warner’s Weather Miracle
The Family Research Council, a group founded by Dr. James Dobson to lobby for Dominionist principles tax-free, has endorsed Delegate “Sideshow Bob” Marshall for U.S. Senate.
As I said earlier today on a blog of ill repute, in Harrisonburg yesterday Mark Warner took the stage in light drizzle, spoke to the Almighty, and in a few minutes the clouds left and the sun came out and shone down upon him.
Apparently someone upstairs called Dr. Dobson on his special direct line from heaven and told him what happened, prompting the quick endorsement. This can only mean that the Republicans’ last hope of retaining divine support is to nominate Marshall.
Republicans must now choose between Jim Gilmore, who did not receive the FRC endorsement and must therefore be in league with Lucifer, or Marshall, who was prevented from meeting the pope last month in order to prevent two densely righteous people from colliding and instantly casting into damnation the entire population of Arlington, a known sanctuary city for unnatural and un-Biblical behaviors.
Will the FRC endorsement affect the GOP Senate nomination? Cast your vote for how many votes Bob Marshall will receive in our May Madness competition!
May 8th, 2008 at 6:59 am
Dominionism? If you search for the term on the Focus on the Family website, you will not find it (see http://www.focusonthefamily.com/). The same is true of the Family Research Council’s website (see http://www.frc.org/). Nonetheless, I suppose supporting strong Christian families, being prolife, and refuting the nonsense that some homosexual activists spout (same-sex marriage) deserves some special appellation. Keep working at it. Perhaps if you spend enough time thinking about it……
Like you, I have discovered it is easy to call people names. My favorite these days for Liberal Democrats (Liberal Democrat just does not have the zing it use to have.) is Busybodyists, followers of Busybodyism. What do you think?
May 8th, 2008 at 7:36 am
Adam - It occurs to me that to give the ideology of Busybodyism real pizazz we need to have a Wikipedia entry with some nice academic language. Would you like to have your name on the "Busybodyist Manifesto"? Don’t worry if you have a degree. We can make one up.
Just think about it. Your name in Wikipedia. The founder of Busybodyism. Cited all across the Internet. Associated with every Democrat group there is. Would that not fill you with pride?
May 8th, 2008 at 10:21 am
Pride is sinful. I try not to have too much of it. And I also avoid being associated with every DemocratIC group just because there are some crazies out there.
But I don’t have to tell you, you know all about crazy.
May 8th, 2008 at 10:37 am
Silly, Adam, Warner didn’t cause God to stop the rain. It was zen. You can see him doing his rain dance in the background.
May 8th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
ok i dont know but ther are always a way out one is leave him see very
May 8th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
If what zen was doing was a rain dance, he’s the whitest dancer ever. I didn’t see him twitch.
May 8th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Raindance? No. The deep soul in these bones would have surly brought forth a deluge had I started to work it. And as much as I want my newly constructed rain barrels to fill, Mark Warner outranks me. His prayer are heard above mine.
May 8th, 2008 at 6:17 pm
zen is pretty white.
May 8th, 2008 at 6:32 pm
Only on the outside
May 8th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
As I write this post I am glancing to the right. I see the current roster of the Whack jobbies and Jobettes. The last one listed is the lovely Whackette(Not to be confused with Wonkette). It states that she is Reired(really). Then I glance above to the comments and there for the whole world to behold is comments by Whackette. I am shocked, yes shocked. If you can’t depend on the veracity of DWJ, what can you depend on. The next thing you know, people will be doubting the words of Hillary Clinton. Then who knows. They might even doubt former President Al Gore. It is a slippery slope.
And while I am glancing again to my right I see a list of "Conservative" blogs. I notice that I am not on it. Just an oversight I am sure,but you need to include a representative of SWACistan on that list. If not I, then please include Swacgirl, Spanky, or JM(Alex). You truly need to round out the roster.
May 10th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
Phil, problem is, Whackette was the one in charge of the blog roll. So, who knows when it will get update.
May 11th, 2008 at 12:32 am
Well I am listed twice on hers. I know there is nothing you would like better than [edited by Adam - inappropriate content].